Most people seem to express some sort of happiness, joy or celebration of life on new year's eve and day. And so quickly it seems to fade away..as if happiness isn't something that can be taken with you every day of the year.
Well, I know that it can. I suggest you take the feeling of joy, hope, excitement and happiness with you as you wake and rest each day. Make every moment matter, give yourself a pat on the back for everything you do well, from remembering to brush your teeth in the morning, to getting a perfect score on that project you worked on for so long. Celebrate every day, and be thankful each day you wake up...it's another day to start your life, to grow, to learn, to love, to live. Forget the stupid drama, the people who pull you down and hurt you, brush off the addictions and chains that hold you back. Stand tall, breathe deep and be proud.
If you make goals this year, perhaps try to write them down in a secret place. Keep them close to your heart. When you accomplish them, reward yourself in healthy ways, and lovingly tell yourself how proud you are. And if you fail? If you don't even come close to what you wanted to achieve, don't be discouraged. Look back on the things you HAVE done, things that maybe you didn't even know you wanted to do, or ways you may have grown, or things you may have overcome. Wrap your arms around yourself and tell yourself that you are proud, and that you love yourself...and that you can and will reach those goals, even if it takes a little longer. Keep your goals to yourself, though, because you don't need the added stress or pressure the world can put on you when you do or do not reach them. Only you and your oppinion matters. And your oppinion of yourself should always be positive. If you learn how to deeply love yourself, and see yourself the way God does.. that's when you will know what love is. That's when you will find the inner happiness that at times can almost seem unreal. And only you can find that love, that happiness and that viewpoint.
This year, take the hope and joy you feel today with you through this whole year, wake up each morning with the excitement of a child. Always have something to look forward to and make every moment happy, because happiness, yeah, it's a choice. =D
I haven't been here in a while, I thought I would stop by and say Hey. I don't think this is a coming back post, at the moment- I'm just not feeling this place. But, I do miss you! I try to read up, but theres just not enough time to read everything once you fall behind.
I hope you are all enjoying this beautiful fall season, mmm it's so wonderful! I can't believe the holiday season is already here. I went to the store after Halloween, I was going to have a late Halloween party for my youth group...and uh... the entire store was now Christmas stuff. Life... why you go so fast, huh? Hehe
So I'm starting a new project..I suppose. It's still really raw and rough, I JUST started..but I'm really enjoying it. If you would like to follow it, read it, or give me thoughts I'll post the link.
It has been awhile since I last talked with you, much has happened and in the same, nothing has changed. Hopes and dreams are scattered around my feet, many days I feel that they will go nowhere and other times I see them floating up and becoming the fiery explosions they ache to become. The almost celestial-like fireworks blowing up in the sky, covering the night with sparks of joy and happiness; of life and love.
It will be mine, I am certain.
Last night I had an experience. They are the kind that are so very rare and I am so blessed to have been given the message. Last night I was set free in a way that I've never felt before.
I am free from these chains of fear and the self abhorring daggers I stab myself with on a daily basis.
I AM FREE.
How dare I speak down to such a beautiful creation. Yes, It's true... me... I am beautiful. He made me. He made me just the way he wanted me to be. He loves me... just as I am... completely unconditionally...forever.
Let me tell you something, there is no one in this world who has a right to tell you that you do not belong, that you are not beautiful or that you do not matter. Because you do belong, you are beautiful and you matter so much more than you know. Free yourselves my friends. Seek HIS love, release your fears, doubts and daggers. Look at yourself through HIS eyes... see the thruth. See how incredible you really are. Know that you are loved...and believe it.
Surround yourself in the ocean you long for. Dive deep and surf the waves. You may not have exactly what it is you want, but whatever you do have can be exactly what you want.
I thought I would write something...since I haven't in so long. But, I can't pull one thought out of the tangled mess of thoughts in my head to talk about. Nothing I try to focus on make sense. So... now what?
In a weird place.
Don't listen to "Wide Awake" it gets stuck in your head more than "Call me maybe" and "Somebody that I used to know" combined. They're all okay though.
I have a lot of silly things I'm looking forward to. My birthday in September. New Degrassi season in October. Halloween in October. Amazing mini holiday in Oct/Nov. Getting to ride in 'Chubbiest Bunny' in Oct/Nov. Thanksgiving in November. THE HOBBIT in December. 3 year anniv. in December. Christmas in December. Moving. FINALLY. in Jan.
So when I'm down I focus on happy things to come. It's hard sometimes. But the little things in life keep us going.
I had a bad experience with a can of air last night. That was pretty scary but amusing.
Blah. In a lot of pain today. This is a stupid post.
Lord, I come to you face down on the floor, I can't physically get low enough. I'm struggling, Lord. I need your guidance, your strength. I'm trying so hard to humble my heart, I'm doing all that I can to live in your shadow. Help me, Jesus.. I'm finding it so hard to love the people who hurt, who kill, who abuse... Today in church, you brought me to Jonah. I read the whole book to my kids, we discussed, we learned, we took in many things you wanted us to hear. You know my heart, Lord, you know that I love so unconditionally, I am slow to judge, I'm accepting, I'm forgiving, and I'm quick to appologize. I teach that we are one body, I do not feel above anyone who doesn't believe what or as I do, I try my best to shine your light and spread your love. But there are times, like today when I struggle so badly with loving those people. How did you humble yourself so greatly, Lord..how did you love the ones who mocked you, who spit in your face. How do you love us, when all we do is hurt each other, and screw up so badly. How can I be more like you, Lord? Please... show me. Help me bring myself lower. Help me to see those people as you do. Help me to see that it is your battle. I do not need to fight back. Help me and my awful memory to see that you are on my side, that you understand how I feel, you understand my tears and my pain. I love you, Jesus.. I need your arms around me tighter today, I'm feeling very weak and hopeless.